Get some gratitude in your attitude!

Gratitude is the feeling or quality of being thankful. It is the readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. And it's good for you!

Researchers have been studying the effects of gratitude for a long time and the outcomes have shown that being grateful can increase your happiness as well as improve your physical and mental health. Gratitude can improve your relationships at home and at work. It has been shown that when an individual expresses gratitude towards their partner, they are more positive about their partner and they feel more open to discussing issues within the relationship. In the workplace, managers who regularly thank their staff and show appreciation notice that their staff feel motivated and work harder.

Americans and Canadians dedicate a whole holiday to being thankful but how can we practise gratitude on a daily basis?

One of the easiest ways to practise gratitude is by journaling (you'll need a new pretty notebook for this). Each day write down 3 new things that you are grateful for. If you do this at the same time each day, your body will make more dopamine, which is considered to be the "feel good" hormone. The things you're grateful for don't have to be deep or complicated. I took the above photograph on a trip to the Blue Mountains earlier this year. Just looking at it, I can be thankful or grateful for fresh air, good weather and my comfy shoes.

I love this quote by Heidi Barr "Practising gratitude doesn't mean burying unwanted feelings or looking for the silver lining in a bad situation. Practising gratitude means acknowledging what is still good alongside the mess." The last 18 months have been difficult for many people and I'm not suggesting that you discount sad times that you might be experiencing. When I lost my Mum last year, I was devastated. There was no silver lining and I experienced a lot of very difficult feelings. But I was so thankful that I was there with her at the end. I was so thankful she knew who we all were. She knew I'd driven a long way to be by her side. I was thankful that four siblings who often don't agree were able to be together and love each other so we could be there for her. I was grateful for the relationship she had with my daughter (her only grandchild) and I was grateful for the palliative care staff who knew what to do and how to speak to us. There were also a lot of things I wasn't grateful for and that's OK because that's part of life.

Gratitude can help you keep your calm in a tricky situation. I am not a naturally calm person. It's something I have to work on. I'm also impatient - I've been working on that for over 30 years! So it would come as no surprise that I sometimes lose my cool on the road. I love driving. I don't love it when other drivers don't drive the way I think they they should. Last year I learnt a thankfulness meditation that can be used safely behind the wheel of a car. Just find something to give thanks for. You don't have to be religious, you can thank God, the universe, or whoever you feel comfortable with. So now when I feel less than kind towards my fellow drivers I start giving thanks for the blue sky, that tree over there, a flock of birds, sunshine, the stars...whatever I can see is fair game. And you know what? I start to calm down and I arrive home with my cheerful mood intact.

There are plenty more ways that we can practise gratitude. Maybe there's someone you've been meaning to thank. The moment might have passed but that doesn't mean you can't still write a letter of thanks. Writing the letter will make you happier and nurture your relationship with the other person. If you send the letter, you will both be happier and the other person will feel appreciated. Make a habit of sending notes of thanks to people in your life and don't forget to write one to yourself. If you don't have time to do that (or feel uncomfortable), send that person a mental thank you. You'll feel happier and more connected to that person. You could practise a quiet gratitude meditation where you give thanks for the simplest of things: being able to breathe, each of your senses, the processes of your body. You could walk in nature and give thanks for everything you see and experience individually. Here's a fun one: commit to one complaint free day per week. The possibilities are endless.

A recent article by Positivepsychology.com listed 28 benefits to cultivating an attitude of gratitude and they include: it makes us happier, it increases our psychological well being, it enhances our positive emotions, it increases our self esteem, it makes people like us, it improves our romantic relationships, family relationships and friendships, it improves our social support, it makes us more optimistic, it makes us more generous, it reduces our impatience, it improves decision making, it reduces depression, it reduces blood pressure, it improves sleep, it increases exercise and overall physical well being and more. These are all things that I would like to see happen in my life and I think most people could benefit as well.

At Break Free Life Coaching, I offer services that will help you improve your happiness and overall sense of well being. Book in for your complimentary first session here on the website so we can meet over a cup of tea to plan the steps you need to take to become a happier you.